Take Advantage of someone you love!!

“A problem shared is a problem halved”…. English proverb

I am a HUGE fan of the quotes found on church marquees; and recently discovered there are a HUGE number of internet sites devoted just to these quotes!  (though this does kind of disappoint me that MAYBE there isn’t a lone person sitting at a wooden desk coming up with these gems weekly..)  I saw the above quote a couple of weeks ago and LOVE it!  I was just waiting for the right moment to share my thoughts, and well, here we are!  (I had NO idea it was an old English proverb, but while discovering this, I found so many more little bits of joy for later dates!)

Anyhoo, as I have deemed this week to be all about “Encouragement”, I have also decided this post could be a good compliment…..

 I do have to admit that though I understand the meaning behind the quote as well as AGREE with it; I don’t always LIVE it. It’s not because I am problem free, or do not have friends and family who are willing to be sounding boards for me; I just have a bad habit of NOT sharing when things are just a little bit LESS Pollyanna than I like.  I am aware of this quirk, yet seem powerless to “make the call”.  I mull over whatever the problem is, telling myself, “it’s all just life”, it will pass quickly, no need to “bother” anyone and soon enough we’ll be back to normal.  But sometimes my “normal” isn’t always so quick and then I begin to think that now too much time has passed, and they may be upset I hadn’t said anything sooner.  So under the guise of avoiding even more bad feelings, I go another day, then week…I think you see where I’m going with this!  

As with “thank you” cards, and it NEVER being too late to send one, it’s NEVER too late to reach out!  I hope my own recent experience with this very thing, stays with me, reminding me of the weightlessness I felt when “someone else knew”.  Though I know I should not “vent” about things that have annoyed me (it’s just like reliving the incident, including the negative emotions), reaching out to family or friends is FAR from venting; it’s giving yourself permission to receive support and encouragement (this week’s word!) from a person who is in your life because they WANT to be!  While you are receiving the gift of support, the people in our lives GIVING this support is also receiving; receiving the affirmation we do VALUE their opinions as well as just putting VALUE to them as part of our life!

So next time, pick up the phone, and TAKE ADVANTAGE of someone!

“There is nothing better than the encouragement of a good friend”

Katharine Butler Hathaway

4 thoughts on “Take Advantage of someone you love!!

  1. Wow!! This post had me near tears because this is so me! I have so many reasons (excuses) for keeping things to myself. I tell myself I’m just a very “private” person, but truthfully I am hiding behind a mask and afraid to let people see me “naked”. I know that it gets in the way of having any real close relationships, but again I convince myself that that’s OK, I’m just fine by myself. My dad was an alcoholic and we had some pretty horrible things to deal with as kids, and you learn in situations like that to just keep things to yourself, when sharing would be so much healthier. (With the right person, of course.) And it just becomes a lifelong habit. I read (in a really excellent book called Changes That Heal – I can’t recommend it highly enough) that we have to make ourselves vulnerable in order to experience real love. Because otherwise people are just loving our mask, and there is a separation between us. So, yes, I really really need to work on this – getting out from behind the pretense and making myself more vulnerable. And it’s true that the longer you wait the more difficult it becomes. And I love the last part about how receiving the support is an affirmation to those with whom we’ve shared that we value them and their opinions. (And it’s hurtful sometimes to our friends or family that we don’t trust them enough or value them enough to let them at least be a shoulder to lean on or cry on.) And also others are probably less inclined to share with us, as well, because we appear to “have it all together” and couldn’t possibly understand or sympathize with their problems. Excellent post!!

    1. Wow right back to you! Thank you so much for sharing this! I am sorry I missed this and am just now seeing it–working on that! Thanks again for reading and sharing, one of the reasons I write this; to get the conversations started!

  2. What a beautiful post. How true it is. I personally want to thank you for being my sounding board , my support and my encouragement on a daily basis. You are an amazing person. Hope I can return the many blessings you have given me.

  3. Thank you Susan! You are too kind and yes, give me too much credit! I am sorry I missed this comment–you even told me you commented and I still missed it….

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